Who is online?

15 users online:
-- 0 registered
-- 3 hidden
-- 12 guests

0 user in the chatroom

(User activity over the last 10 minutes)

1803 registered users
Members List

Poetry Showcase [Other] Moderators for this section: Weaver, ochsterboxter, CadenzRime, Lingua Pura, ososment, carolynrn, Inker

What is this life?

Outline: I guess it's sunshine deprivation. Roll on Spring!
A soulless earth, a soulless sky
A puzzling life, and then we die.

Three generations in one day
Will fight to keep the years at bay.

One writes about his daily strife
To leave some mark against his life.

One procreates for all he’s worth
To leave his seed within the earth.

Another looks around and sees
The pain of suffering and disease.

He strives to change things as he must
But joins the victims in the dust.

So everything just stops one day
And then they throw our things away.

A soulless sky, a soulless earth,
A few brief tears are all we’re worth.
CadenzRime
[Fri Mar 24, 2006 12:40 pm]
Ah but isnt that why we write......to leave a little more behind than the average bod. Perfect R&M to this little poem and a great read. Smile
_________________
Checkout my new site The Poetry of Cadenz Rime
Report to moderator
KRC168
[Fri Mar 24, 2006 12:46 pm]
A very fluent and enjoyable read, and I agree, you have now left an extra little bit of yourself behind.
Report to moderator
Cul-De-Sac
[Fri Mar 24, 2006 1:11 pm]
Reminded me of the beautiful and melodic song 'Four Seasons In One Day' by Crowded House. Though your ending is melancholy it is rhythmic and somewhat whimsical melancholia and reads well.

Cheer up, your sunshine period is just around the corner and sure to warm you up...a bit. Wink

Cheers Cul
_________________
Oedipus liked his eyes runny...
Report to moderator
mad lemur
[Fri Mar 24, 2006 8:34 pm]
There seems to be a melancholic mood on the boards at the moment.

Hug

Everyone leaves a little of themselves behind in this world. Some microcosmic organism in whatever form will always be around. It depends on each individual as to what and how they leave it to be found.

Good rhythm throughout.

Be happy, mousey. Or I shall be forced to make you laugh in Gosport.

ml
x
Report to moderator
novicechick
[Fri Mar 24, 2006 9:24 pm]
Although I am a new visitor, this is the piece I have enjoyed reading the most. It says sooooo much....

I enjoy it more each time I read it.

Ta very much!!
Report to moderator
Anonymouse
[Sat Mar 25, 2006 12:58 pm]
Thanks, friends, for your comments on my little piece of immortality!!!
Actually this was written backwards from the line
Quote:
and then they throw your things away

which I found in a recent reading of "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nihgt-Time" (Mark Hadden) I hadn't thought of death in quite such a depressingly final way before!!! And I'm glad other people don't either!
_________________
"We are such stuff as dreams are made on
And our little life is rounded with a sleep!"
WS
Report to moderator
Loobyloo
[Sun Mar 26, 2006 10:06 am]
nony - a glum view, and yet quite hauntingly written. You've certainly captured the mood.

looby Very Happy
Report to moderator
Ian Gould
[Mon Mar 27, 2006 9:34 am]
The dull drudge between winter and spring, even nature is confused. You do capture this melancholy well, like the others have said and just as nature struggles and strives to make a difference, so do we in life.
To say so much in so few words, this is poetry.
You don't need to be melancholy to write a melancholy poem, these feelings are filed away in lifes experience section of the mind.
If I had written it, I wish I had, I would feel very happy.
Excellent.
Ian Earth
Report to moderator
Sammy-Sparkle
[Mon Mar 27, 2006 8:42 pm]
Shush, Anony, you're giving the secrets of the trade away. Laughing
I nearly always write my poems in reverse order. That way you're guaranteed a good punchline. Great stuff. Laughing
Report to moderator
1