Did I Dream It?

The Randomer · [Sat Aug 20, 2005 7:41 pm]

I like the repeated, "Did I dream it" at the start of each verse. Each verse has perfect structure and rhyme. I think most people have had a "I did i dream that?" experience and this poem is an excellent representation of it.

I wish you luck in the Fantasy Challenge.
_________________

sravasti · [Sat Aug 20, 2005 10:50 pm]

Hello Ron,

Like The Randomer, I enjoyed this poem, the uncertain and wishful quality of the dream and the simplicity with which you conveyed this.

annie

Ron · [Sun Aug 21, 2005 11:17 am]

Thanks, Matt, your comments are very nice and thanks for inviting me into the challenge. Good luck to you too.

annie, always nice to hear from you. I do love 'wistful and simple', don't you? So much easier to do, as well, than deep-meaningful, structured, verse. When you relax and just say what you think it just flows out naturally without having to think.

Thanks again, both.

ps, Matt, any idea why I don't get alerted to a Review until after I've started replying to that Review?

Fancyjean · [Sun Aug 21, 2005 5:31 pm]

You shouldn't have writen it was about the FC, then peoples conclusions could have been interesting for you to observe.

SparroWyrm · [Mon Aug 22, 2005 3:52 pm]

Hehe you're right, wistful and simple is often so effective.
This is a great. I love the rhyme of:
"Did I dream it or was it real?...
...But did I dream or did you feel..."

and I liked:

"Did I dream it or did you say
That you were mine regardless?"

As Randomer says the repetition of "Did I dream it" works really well.

Short and sweet!

Good one

PenJen · [Fri Sep 02, 2005 6:25 pm]

Hi Ron,

I did wonder what 'F.C' stood for (I first though something to do with football....) until I read Randomer's comment - yes, could be a little fantasy but certainly no sci-fi; rather a delicate little spell of thought. I liked the gentle tease of this - was quite lovely, although the 'yardstick' wasn't for me. (or was it?! Shocked

)

Do dream a little dream and may they all come true!

Jen Fairy

x

Ron · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 4:43 pm]

Thanks, Jen,

Ahh, dreams, eh? Very Happy

Love having a dream and then making it come true... happens, occasionally too Wink

...not often enough, though, for me... am I being greedy now? Confused

Hmmn... maybe Very Happy

Ron · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 4:51 pm]

Fancyjean,

Typed it quickly for the challenge... oh, well, there you go... thanks for your thoughts Very Happy

Jack,

, man,

...glad you liked it and thanks for your comments Wink

Clarissa · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 4:53 pm]

Like Jen, I had no idea what the FC was and also thought football.
Like Jen, not too sure about that 'yardstick'
but like all the others, yep,this is a good un.
'Gotta have a dream to make a dream come true' and sometimes what seems like a dream is in fact true.
Clarissa Love

even if you are mad at me!

Ron · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 5:00 pm]

Mad at you? Have you gone bonkers on me again? Why on Earth would I be mad at you? Confused

I used 'yardstick' as a sort of Ideal to, hopefully, live up to.

Love

Clarissa · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 5:01 pm]

But yardstick is such an ugly word...

PenJen · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 5:07 pm]

Aye, and what IS a 'Chopper', Ron?! You never did tell me... Wink eye

Ron · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 5:08 pm]

OK, then, love, I'll throw it back to the crowd and if you're quick you get first shot... knowing what I'm aiming for rewrite the last line of my poem and I'll use the one I like the best with full acreditation Wink

Ron · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 5:11 pm]

Ah, Jen... where ye been all me life, eh? Laughing

PenJen · [Sun Sep 04, 2005 5:13 pm]

"While dreaming of completeness...?" Shocked

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Did I Dream It?

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Poetry Showcase [Other]	Moderators for this section: Weaver, ochsterboxter, CadenzRime, Lingua Pura, ososment, carolynrn, Inker
Did I Dream It? Outline: F.C. Poem on the subject of 'Dreams'. Did I dream it or was it real? The scent was there and you did laugh. But did I dream or did you feel The Love that lay upon our path? Did I dream it or did you say That you were mine regardless? And did we kiss and say, “Let’s play!” While dreaming of a yardstick?