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Poetry Showcase [Other] Moderators for this section: Weaver, ochsterboxter, CadenzRime, Lingua Pura, ososment, carolynrn, Inker

Running from Temptation

Outline: An allegory - or something!
Last week I met Temptation,
I thought I’d done with men,
And this bold face was one
I had not thought to see again.

That sly old smile was waiting,
Eyes narrowed in the sun.
My Resolution faltered and
Temptation thought he’d won.

Old memories were tugging me
To follow them back home
But I have dreams a-plenty now
And do not stand alone.

He casts his line to catch me
And reel me in to him
And in this crazy whirlpool
I’m forgetting how to swim.

At first I am quite frantic
In Temptation’s gentle arm.
This does not feel like Sin at all,
I start to feel quite calm.

But Conscience rears her ugly head
And tries to spoil my fun.
She drags me from this warm embrace
And counsels me to run.

So I’m running from Temptation,
I’m leaving all this mess.
Thank God I had the wit to get
A forwarding address!
Roy
[Tue May 10, 2005 12:16 am]
Thank god for that last line, too Smile

There is a limit to the value of virtue. Mine's pretty cheap, actually...

Nice Poem though, Anony. Perfect rhyme and rhythm as always.
_________________
Roy

www.royeveritt.com
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sravasti
[Tue May 10, 2005 12:56 am]
This was a really enjoyable read, the rhyme and rhythm really so flowing and easy, and as Roy mentioned, thank god for the last line! It really put a smile on my face.

annie
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coastmoor
[Tue May 10, 2005 9:17 am] The end is not in sight
This begins for me like Dylan or Waits, nope it's definitely a Dylan song, is it Jack of Hearts, nope I'm wandering.

Anyway

The lyrics flow, without false rhyme and with sound reason

Unlike those before me, whilst the end was fun, I thought the poem would equally stand, without this swift exchange

Thanks

Coast
_________________
>
When everything is electronic and eternally renewable, the gap between the rough draft and the fair copy is eroded; and perhaps it is within the gap that thoughts, as well as letters, are finally joined up

Biwater; Lost Worlds
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Mmagic
[Sat May 14, 2005 6:49 pm]
What a charming poem! Lovely to cast the two protagonists as 'Temptation' and 'Conscience'. Was that a deliberate reference to Roy's opus in the last line?

Lovely rhyme and rhythm to the poem: and it tells a coherent story too. I enjoyed it very much indeed. Thanks for sharing, Anony.

Andrew
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Anonymouse
[Sun May 15, 2005 4:20 pm]
#Thanks for your comments. You read something and it sparks an idea, so thankyou, Roy, for the "forwarding address"! It just amused me to think of Temptation leaving one - for future reference! You never know when you may need a bit of Temptation to buck you up!!
_________________
"We are such stuff as dreams are made on
And our little life is rounded with a sleep!"
WS
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