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Poetry Showcase [Horror] Moderators for this section: Weaver, ochsterboxter, CadenzRime, Lingua Pura, ososment, carolynrn, Inker

A Canary Chirped


Outline: Originally a 'Flash' on 'Flash Poetry Group' - thanks, Bernie, for the inspiration.
A Canary Chirped


"Where's there's muck there's brass," he said.
A Davey Lamp shone on his head.

Then in the gloom of Way Down Deep
Where ponies pull and no one sleeps . . .

There came a deafening roar.

And no one saw the roof fall in
But in the terrifying din . . .

A Canary chirped.

Silence fell and lights went out
And in the darkness came a shout . . .

"Is anyone about?"

Five men yelled and a ten year-old boy
And seven said nowt.

A Canary chirped.

Author Explanation: In Tribute to all those hard-working, brave, souls - man and boy and donkey too - who paid the price for a lifestyle above-ground that Society demanded then and still demands today. God be with the Modern Miner wherever he be.

maipenrai

[Sun Nov 19, 2006 9:27 am] a canary chirped

an excellent piece, surprised you have had so little comeback on this.
_________________
I know that you have suffered lad
but suffer this a while
whatever makes a soldier cry
will make a killer smile

L. Cohen
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Ron

[Sun Nov 19, 2006 1:04 pm]

Cheers, Bernie Very Happy without you this poem would not be here. Wink Thanks for the phrase that sparked it off. Very Happy

It's early days, more may read it. Wink

Cheers
_________________
". . . and in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make." - The Beatles
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puddleglum

[Mon Nov 20, 2006 10:45 am]

I agree with Bernie! This deserves more attention. It is a simple yet dramatic account of life in the mines, which is vividly remembered. Perhaps people are too young to remember the use of canaries for gas detection in mines. Keep chirping, boy, and they'll keep smiling!

Very good poem.

Patrick
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Ron

[Mon Nov 20, 2006 12:01 pm]

Cheers Patrick Very Happy

I'm very glad you liked this. Bernie put forward the first line as one of the challenges on the Flash group and sparked off a few, quite different, interpretations and scenarios. Very Happy

Cool review, mate. Wink

Cheers
_________________
". . . and in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make." - The Beatles
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ASmallNumberOfMonkeys

[Tue Nov 21, 2006 12:28 am]

Me too - sorry it’s been so long waiting. This is well worth a read and comment, and my birds keep reminding me about your canary.

I enjoy this for the scene and drama of disaster; the language of the miners, the davey lamp lighting and canary chirping echoing within the dark hollows you describe. And of course as you say the memory of lives and now a lifestyle lost.

A lot packed in to a few words, but I think that was their way too. A good read Ron, thanks I enjoyed this Smile .

Mark
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carrieann

[Tue Nov 21, 2006 12:33 am]

Well written, sad piece. Authentic also in that you manage to capture the Northern dialect "Where There's muck, there's brass" and "nowt" - excellent word choice there.
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Ron

[Tue Nov 21, 2006 11:56 am]

Mark,

Thanks for dropping by and I'm pleased you enjoyed this. Very Happy

Mines like the one described still exist in various parts of the world where there is no such thing as 'Health and Safety' and young children are employed in droves. Crying or Very sad

carrieann,

The accent wernt too difficult for me, bonny lass, as I was brought up in the North East, pet. Laughing

Glad you liked this and thanks for peeking into my imagination again. Very Happy

Cheers, both. Cheers
_________________
". . . and in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make." - The Beatles
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Ian Gould

[Fri Nov 24, 2006 10:01 am]

This drew my attention. The 'Deputy' in charge of an area or 'working' down the mine would check for gas with his Davey lamp (health and safety), therefore Deputies were commonly called canaries.
Private firms are bothered about profits not workers and so where there are no rules to follow there is little safety. Thankfully there is H&S in this country but a hundred and fifty years ago there wasn't.
This poem fell on different levels and made me think. There are so many firms that would like to rid themselves of safety because it costs them too much money. Some may fancy the cheap labour of children as well. No wonder so many firms quit Britain for more profitable lands.(the excuse being, 'we're doing it for our shareholders')

Excellent
Ian
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Ron

[Fri Nov 24, 2006 1:28 pm]

Thanks, Ian, Very Happy

Yeah, buncha money-grabbin' bastids - those who 'move abroad' to set-up sweat-shops packed with kids to increase Profit Margin. Evil or Very Mad

I am one of the biggest supporters of 'The Global Village' - yahoo - but not off the backs of Slaves.

Thanks for dropping by, mate. Very Happy

Cheers
_________________
". . . and in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make." - The Beatles
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